Fulfillment

I find myself in a bit of a rut these days. I work at a job which was meant to be a short term stepping stone toward the achievement of my dream occupation. Unfortunately, the problem which this job was meant to address found renewed sustenance in other matters. Thus my problem remains and has grown to include employment that is not self rendered, as desired. In addition, the work I do is quite rote, and distinctly unsatisfying, in that I feel no sense of progress toward my goal, nor any impression of making a positive contribution to the aspects of the world in which I find value.

Doing work that lacks fulfillment can be quite dispiriting, and should most definitely be avoided as best as possible. Having discovered my dream occupation, and finding myself elsewhere than that path, I have come to greatly appreciate the notion of "do what you love". I have spent many years doing things that merely suited my fancy, but now that I know in what manner I believe my bliss to exist, I find nothing outside of that course even remotely rewarding.

It's good to be driven. I am actually sort of new to being driven to something which I am unable to immediately obtain, or to which I see no clear path to acquisition. Though the light at the end of this meandering tunnel cannot yet be seen, its brilliance is felt in my very soul. I do what I am inspired to do in efforts toward the manifestation of this dream, yet I have a persistent sense that this is largely out of my control; therefore, many of those efforts are centered around openness - being open to ideas, connections, and opportunities. This is proving to be a pointed lesson in patience, but the fantasy I hold in my heart fills me with such joy, that I am frequently rejuvenated and repeatedly hopeful.

As I trudge through this period of murkiness, I take solace in the knowledge that I am working towards the manifestation of ultimate fulfillment. I wish for each person to find their own.