Thursday, September 24, 2015

Virtual relocation

I've started a new blog in conjunction with my life-coaching practice:

Anything I might have posted here, will now be posted there.
(Though I may be back someday...)

Thanks for reading!!

Saturday, August 22, 2015


Folks talk.

Some say, about people, things, or ideas.

I find value in the distinction between external vs. internal experiences.

It is in the sharing of our internal experiences that we find meaningful connection.

Friday, July 24, 2015

Pesky procrastination

Do you often put off to tomorrow what could be done today? There just aren’t enough hours in the day, are there?! Do you also have certain standards of quality for your output? Anything worth doing, is worth doing well, right? Would you be surprised to know that procrastination and perfectionism are closely linked? It’s true!

I used to delay action because I didn’t have the time or the energy to give a particular project my usual 110%, and I knew that once I started, I wouldn’t stop until it met my satisfaction, and was complete. It was either 0 or 110, and 0 was frequently more appealing! I would rely on the pressure of the deadline to get things done, rather than work on them in a comfortable and leisurely fashion, which would have allowed more room for creativity and fine tuning.
As it turns out, those of us who hold ourselves to excessively high standards are also quite critical of ourselves. In fact, we are even rather judgmental of others, as well. We may not voice our criticisms aloud, but we think them; we spew labels and evaluations all the time. They seem so innocuous; we barely notice that we are doing it. “Stupid driver.” “Rude clerk.” “Hideous outfit.” “I can’t believe he just said that.” “What was she thinking?” “Ugh – I’m such an idiot! How did I miss that?!” 

The truth is, we’re all human. We are all fallible creatures, just trying to do our best with the resources available to us – time, finances, energy, intelligence - as limited and imperfect as they often are. Whenever we are able to muster some sort of acceptance of this fact, and even perhaps an appreciation of the beauty in it, we can harness compassion. Having compassion for ourselves and for others provides us with a certain kind of patience that is very calming

Rather than concerning ourselves with perfecting our performance, we would be much better served to focus our efforts on PROGRESS. Baby steps. That is all that is required to keep us moving forward, and to further us in the achievement of our goals. Mistakes may be made along the way, but they will be smaller, and easier to catch and learn from. In actuality, anything worth doing, is worth doing poorly. Prioritize taking action. Start now!

Sunday, May 24, 2015


I can safely say that one of the key elements to a happy life, has to do with habits.

We all have them - beliefs, thought patterns, emotional responses, thought patterns, thought processes, behaviors, activities... all on auto-pilot. The question is: Are they serving you, or hindering you? To take it a step further: Did you choose any of them, or did any, or all of them, just take root without your consent? Be sure to set yourself up for success by examining all of your automated behaviors, and replacing the unhelpful ones with empowering ones. Here's a great read with some handy tips.

One of my favorite anecdotes about silly traditions and useless habits is a joke that goes something like this:

It's Easter Sunday, and a woman prepares the ham by chopping off the ends and placing it in the pan. Her husband asks, "Honey, why is it that you always cut the ends off the ham?" She wonders for a moment and replies, "You know, I'm not sure; that's just how my mom always did it." Without pause, she hollers over to her mother, who is visiting for the holiday and reclining in the other room, "Mom - how come you always cut the ends off the ham before you cook it?" Mom belts back, "I got that from your grandma - ask her." The woman phones her grandmother: "Grandma, why did you chop off the ends of the Easter ham?" Grandma: "The pan was too small."

Sunday, November 9, 2014


That deep feeling of social connection with a group of others whom you relate to as Us or We. The intimate knowledge of the lives of others whose endeavors are important to you. That internal sense of concern for others' well-being, and elation for their achievements.

Why don't we have more of this?

Every time I ponder the ails of our modern culture, I come back - time and again - to a lack of community. While most of us may experience this with our families and/or our circle of friends, that tends to be the extent of it.

If we had true community; if we knew our neighbors, even though the inhabitants of the homes near ours are likely to change on occasion; if we related to the people we encounter throughout our days as the fellow human beings they are, with the same experiences of joy and sorrow; if we sought to support all the people around us, even with just an encouraging smile; if we considered the effects of our actions on those around us; we just might find that a great many of our frustrations become resolved.

Too often, too many steps get skipped, from aspects within our own body - our community of cells, so to speak - to aspects within our own selves and lives, to aspects within our family and closest social network, to aspects within our neighborhood, to aspects within our city, state, country, continent, hemisphere, and planet. We ought to bring our focus back to localization. That whole "be the change" is great advice, and reestablishing community is a great start.

It begins with self-sufficiency, and then, when you have a goal you cannot achieve alone, you start with the next closest person or persons; you don't reach out to strangers, hundreds of miles away. And when those around you need help, you give it, so that they will be there for you in your time of need, and so that your heart will grow in its capacity to experience joy. There is such enrichment to be gained through community, and so much benefit to everyone.

Friday, October 10, 2014


Happiness is not meant to be a destination, but our purpose. It is not something that is attained, it is either achieved by grace or by choice. It is a state of being that can be cultivated through practice. This practice is our duty to ourselves. It is being called "Blissipline".

By repeatedly training yourself to be grateful for your circumstances, you strengthen your joy skills. Recalling how far you've come, remaining cognizant of how blessed you are, and maintaining an eager zeal for where you are going, will tap you into a magnitude of power known only to the blissiplined.

Engage in joy regularly. Enhance your experience by inventorying your beliefs, shedding those that limit you, and building on those that empower you. Intensify the effects by establishing routines that connect your spirit with the Spirit of the Universe.


After many years of promising to myself that I would take up meditation, I have finally established the practice. The benefits are as vast as the methods are varied, and I highly recommend it for all. The funny thing about it is the paradox between its simplicity to perform, and its complexity to explain. Many newcomers believe it to be much more complicated or difficult than it is. While the ultimate goal may be to clear your mind completely, a very worthy approximation is to focus your attention on just one thing. This approach opens up a plethora of possibilities. It also means that we meditate more often than we realize! Any time you study something, or find yourself in a groove working on something, or put your mind to visualizing a specific scenario - be it recalling past events, making plans for a future endeavor, or imagining a desired outcome - you are effectively meditating.

I find that routine is quite helpful to my practice, and I have incorporated a handful of expert opinions, as well as my own personal flare. The system I have adopted involves a morning set which I do first-thing (I may use the restroom and/or make the bed real quick first, but that's it), often involves some appropriate music, and takes approximately 15 minutes; and an evening set I do just before crawling into bed, which only takes about 7 minutes. I am inspired to share my method with you :)

In the AM:

~ I take my peaceful spot on the floor, and commence with some stretches.

~ Sitting upright, I just breathe few breaths.

~ I then open all my chakras, making the associated hand formations, and stating my related affirmations:
      "I am grounded and connected to the earth.
      I am a sensual being with creative abilities.
      I have great power and an effective will.
      I am loving, open, and empathetic.
      I express myself, and speak the truth.
      I have vision, clarity, insight, and intuition.
      I am one with Source (the Source is One)."
{These are affirmations I put together as statements that ring true for me in relation to my understanding of each of the chakras; feel free to use them, but I encourage you to explore your own.}

~ With this Oneness recognition, I then transition into a recommended series, which begins with envisioning a beam of white or pink light flowing down into me from Source, filling me with love, and then flowing out of me to fill the room, and then the house, and then my neighborhood, my city beyond, my state, the continent, and the world. {At this point, I am usually smiling.}

~ Filled with love, I discharge any negativity held in grudges, by calling to mind one or two people who have gotten under my skin; sometimes I conjure my own self. I picture them facing me, and say to them, "I forgive you. Can you forgive me?" We smile together, and then I pray for them with, "May you be filled with loving-kindness; may you be well; may you be peaceful and at ease; may you be happy. I love you; I bless you; I release you." {The releasing is especially relieving because dispels any judgement, obligation, or expectation tied up in there.}

~ Moving on, I visualize my ideal life 3 years from now {apparently, people tend to overestimate what they can accomplish in 1 year, and underestimate 3 years' time}, focusing on health, relationships, and abundance.

~ Then I take note of 10 things for which I am grateful today, particularly blessings that have occurred recently, including some personal, and some professional.

~ Next I walk through my coming day, setting intentions for each plan to go excellently, making sure to incorporate my evening meditation (as I keep forgetting it!), followed by an intention for restful and regenerative sleep. I also set an overall intention for the day, to guide my spiritual growth, such as "to be present", "to refrain from judgment", or "to incorporate frequent moments of stillness".

~ In the final step of this recommended series, I imagine love and blessings pouring over me from Omni.

~ Taking the yogic "Child's Pose", I recall my gratitude prayer: "O Universal Existence, I am eternally grateful to share in your loving light. To know such joy is a divine gift, extended of your wise and benevolent grace. May your will be manifest in my life. Thank you."

~ Moving into a pre-push-up position, I stretch a little more, take three slow and deep breaths, and state, "With this effort, I strengthen my body." I then perform a brief workout of three short intervals:
     30 mountain climbers,
     20 bicycle crunches, and
     10 forward lunges

~ I bring my palms together and think, "I am here, I am grateful, I am Love." I smile.

In the PM:

~ Seated next to my bed, I breathe a few breaths.

~ In order to better acknowledge my achievements, I then recap my whole day.

~ To get a head-start on tomorrow, the next thing I do is set a general intention for it.

~ Then, as it is the single most highly recommended practice for health and happiness, I do another round of thanksgiving.

~ And finally, "I am here; I am grateful; I am love."